Thoughts about Prayer

Recently while kneeling in a prayer circle, instead of rehearsing what I was going to say when it was my turn, I decided to really listen to what the others were saying.  Gradually it occurred to me that this prayer circle was a strange ritual.  I got the feeling those praying weren’t really talking to God but were speaking for the rest of us to listen to how cleverly they could weave together a collection of cliques I have heard since I was a little boy.  I got the feeling they were praying for their human audience and I wondered if God bothered to pay attention.  If I was very wrong and they really were talking to God why should I be eavesdropping?   When I am talking to someone about really meaningful things I don’t particularly like having others listening.  They can listen when it is trivial but not when it counts.

I realize I am being judgmental and wrongly projecting my own cynicism on others.  So please forgive me.  The older I become the more personal prayer becomes.  The things I want to talk to God about are not for your ears or the ears of those with whom I work and play.  When I pray in public I want to ask God to indulge my trivia knowing that I will get back to Him later with what is really on my heart.

“Now it was in those days that Jesus went to a mountain to pray, and he spent the whole night in prayer to God.”  Luke 6:12.  Do you ever wonder what They talked about?  Surely it was a dialogue.  The following verses tell of Jesus calling the twelve to ministry.  That night they must have talked about each of the twelve one by one.  Now that’s a conversation I wish I had listened in on.

Written by Roger Bothwell on August 8, 2008

Spring of Life Ministry, PO Box 124, St. Helena, CA 94574